Too often, as if it is a normal occurrence, people who live in states like Mississippi, Louisiana, or Florida face hurricane threats with potential property destruction. Then, there are concerns about how to clean up the mess, who should do so, and whether the homeowner’s insurance covers these types of disasters.
When I was a teenager, my mom and uncle owned a general contracting construction company that specialized in fire restoration and storm damage board-ups. The first thing we advised our clients to do was to call the proper authorities, such as but not limited to:
- Police
- Fire
- EMS
- FEMA
- Red Cross
- Insurance company
- Public Adjuster
According to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control), they recommend the following guidelines when cleaning up after a hurricane, “Take steps to protect yourself and your loved ones during your cleanup after a hurricane, flood, or other natural disaster.
Follow our cleanup tips and monitor your radio or television for up-to-date emergency information.
- Get the right safety gear
- Use teams to move heavy or bulky objects
- Pace yourself
- Be careful when using a chain saw
- Be careful when using a pressure washer
- Stay safe in hot weather
- Be careful with floodwater
- Be mindful of potential hazards
- Prevent carbon monoxide poisoning
- Be aware of any electrical hazards
- Be careful with dangerous materials,”.
But what about recovering in a philosophical sense? A tornado or hurricane, if you will, created out of self-destruction and self-will run riot. How does one clean up the destruction and emotional mess they caused to those around them during their hurricane temper tantrum of untreated alcoholism?
What does “emotional tornado” mean?
Psychology Today defines an emotional tornado, “Just like real tornadoes, emotion tornadoes seem to come out of nowhere and may sneak up on you if you’re not on watch or heeding a warning. It might be someone experiencing intense emotions that render them unable to consider the people in their environment,”.
In Chapter Six, Into Action, when talking about how one should attempt to clean up the emotional mess they created, the book of Alcoholic Anonymous writes, “The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. Hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead. Affections have been uprooted. Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil.
Yes, there is a long period of reconstruction ahead. We must take the lead. A remorseful mumbling that we are sorry won’t fill the bill at all. We ought to sit down with the family and frankly analyze the past as we now see it, being very careful not to criticize them. So we clean house…,”.
How to cope with an alcoholic
In recovery groups, sober people become very close friends, especially if they were friends before recovery. Sometimes, one of those friends relapses and starts using again. The friend who is still sober may build resentments and have feelings of anger, fear, and sadness.
Recovering individuals say that resentment is the number one offender and that they must address it promptly. They also say that you do not have control over someone else’s addiction and that they will “get you drunk, before you get them sober”. So, they suggest being blunt and honest with the addict and then stepping back from the friendship.
Here’s a letter from a friend who has been emotionally wounded by their alcoholic friend, who stopped recovering and has decided not to allow their friend’s tornado to affect them anymore. She writes:
“Dear Friend,
I am beyond grateful that you were sober and willing to go to any lengths to stay that way and to help me find sobriety when I reached out for help. Thank you for being a good example and friend back then. I will always love you for that.
But I will not congratulate you on Aug 1 because you are no longer sober.
I know you have not drunk alcohol. I am talking about the tranquilizers that you take with purpose. In your words many times, “I’m done with today so I’m going to knock myself out!” As you pound your highchair and act like queen baby. Furthermore, please call them what they are: Benzodiazepines.
I’m willing to step on your toes today and not co-sign your BS.
Let’s face it, you stopped, actually, you refused to go to any lengths during the COVID pandemic. Since then, instead of finding other meetings, you don’t go to any. If you were serious, you’d be on Zoom or go to a meeting close to home. That is, if it’s your digestive issues that stop you.
Every single test has said that you don’t have cancer. What you have is untreated alcoholism. I’m still so disappointed and disgusted that you manipulated me into feeling sorry for you when it’s all bullshit. You hurt me and made me grieve by telling me that you are dying. You brought someone to my home that I don’t like one bit, and frankly, I don’t have to. How dare you. How about I bring up that person you don’t like in our conversations and invite her to your home? You wouldn’t like that, would you?
You’ve talked poorly about your recovery friends in your state, trashed your meetings, and recovery overall. You even laughed at me when I said my sobriety and my recovery friends are everything to me.
You manipulated me into thinking that your parents were “so mean” and didn’t care for you. Are you kidding me? Your mother literally waits on you – brings you food to your room, and cleans up after you. They are supporting a grown adult, and you have the nerve to complain in an effort to get me to do things for you because they can’t or won’t?
I realize it’s on me and that I fell for your BS, and I am working through this. You took advantage of my kindness and willingness to help someone in need. Shame on you. I’m done being tolerant.
This doesn’t even cover ALL the horrible, childish things you’ve done and said in the last four-plus years.
I do love you, but I will not congratulate you. You are no longer the person I met and wanted to be like back in 2019. As you say, you’re an asshole. Yes, today you’re the asshole friend I didn’t want to be around or have near my kids when you were in the depths of your disease years ago.
I hope you can find your way back to the rooms, get sober again, and stop trying to kill yourself because you don’t like the cards you’ve been dealt.
No, I will not congratulate you because that’s just delusional, my friend. I can only pray you make it back alive,”.
Harsh? Maybe. But it is said that if you “baby an addict, you will bury the addict.”
How to help clean up after a hurricane
In conclusion, effective hurricane cleanup requires preparation, teamwork, and resilience. By following these steps, communities can recover and rebuild stronger than before. Whether it’s a physical storm or an emotional one, stay safe and be proactive!